Harry Pothead and the sorcerer that got stoned
by wraith-69
Summary: The Real story of Harry Pothead, a story about his drug fetish and the evil forces of Lord Vicadin
1. The need for weed please review

Harry Pothead And he Sorcerer that got stoned By: Eric Champagne  
Chapter One: Higher than a mother fcker

It was another gloomy day within the Gryffindor common room, Ron, Harry and... "Who the fuck..." ...Ron, the dumb ass in the corner and Hermione were... "What the hell, you little mother fucker, call me a dumb ass will ya." Harry said disgruntled. "Do I look disgruntled to you, you fucking cock sucker, and quit saying that shit after I talk, you don't fucking know how I think you little bitch, show yourself, I'll kick your ass." Said Harry looking now even more constipated. "Bring it on hoe, fuck with me will ya..."  
"Harry, Harry... who are you talking to." Said Hemroide. "You shut your bitch ass up you dirty slut, it's just between him and me." "Who in the hell are you? And quit calling me constipated, do I look like I need to take a shit to you?" Well yah ya do, I am the narrator and you're fucking up my story. "Your story, your fucking story! This is my life and you're fucking it up, with your fake ass shit flying around no wonder you ain't got no bitch, I'm gonna shit in your eye." "Your stoned again Pothead aren't ya." Said Ron annoyingly. "You, you fucking skinny ass bitch, I'll kick your ass around like the little red-headed step child you are." With that Ron shut his mouth and ran squealing like a little bitch...I mean girl into the dorms.  
"Now if you're the fucking narrator, go get me that dumb ass house elf...um...Dooby."  
You mean Dobby.  
"Whatever that little shits name is, go bring him here?" With that Dobby the house elf appeared.  
"So Dooby didn't I fucking tell you to refill my stash?"  
"Sorry Sir, there is a plot, an evil plot..."  
"You little bastard who the fuck are you talking about?"  
"Dobby can't say sir."  
"You will tell me before I decapitate your ass and stuff your head onto the wall."  
"Dobby is used to death threats sir urgh..."  
"...You tell me right fucking now," said Harry while almost choking the life out of the little house elf.  
"Urgh, ucrk, lord...urck...vic...urgh...Lord Vikeadin...uhh." With that Harry let the elf go.  
"Now that's all I needed to know, now what does this dealer charge?" Said Harry anxiously.  
"You better get your dumb ass up you stupid elf, and now get me my gravity bong?"  
"Sir here sir." Then Harry slapped the elf across the room.  
"You fucking bastard." Said Hemroide.  
"Shut the hell up, you still going on with that spew bullshit, spew on this skank." Then Harry grabbed his dick.  
"And you, you fucking narrator, leave me the fuck alone!" While stoned and drunk Harry passed out. Ha take that Pothead your ass is asleep, fuckin pansy...sorry had to get that out. Now where is his stash?  
  
The next day Harry awoke with a hangover the size of Uranus.  
"God damn it, it wasn't a dream." Harry then went to stand up.  
"Oh fuck, my ass, it fucking feels numb, oh shit and it hurts like a mother fucker, what the fuck happened."  
Well I felt a little horny last night, I tried to stick it in the couch and screw the hell out of the cushion but that was kind of rough and hurt a little, so then I found a hole in the wall but soon found out it was home to five mice, and I'm not going to explain that, so I looked around again, and there you were. Past out on your stomach so I grabbed you're hips and I...  
"Oh shit, mother fucking god damn it." Harry yelled as his ass began to throb even more.  
Harry grabbed his wand and said healido and his ass was healed. Mean while Hemorrhoid was sleeping with her head faced down in Harry's lap. Waking up she looked at harry.  
"What the hell did we do last night?" She asked. "Hell if I know." Harry grinned, slowly Ron made his way out of the dorm. He was carrying a big glass bong with a shopping bag full of weed. "Where the fuck is my stash," harry bellowed. "Ron get your ass down here, what the hell's in that bag." Ron jumped and dropped his bong, with a loud clash it shattered and the water sprayed everywhere. Then he ran for the dorm room again. "You little bastered," harry yelled, damn that shit stinks." "Hey hemorrhoid were is Mike?" "Mike who, who are you talking about?" "You know Mike Okisbig don't you?" said harry with a wide ass faggot grin across his face. "Didn't I tell you to shut the fuck up and go find a bitch like I told you!" Well I did last night, I already told you that story already.  
"Oh fuck, blhm." Harry then puked all over the floor in front of him.  
"Now where the fuck is my go damn stash?" Harry yelled while feigning  
for some drugs.  
"Hemorrhoid get your loopy ass up there and get me that bag Ron dropped!"


	2. Chapter 2

Harry Pothead And he Sorcerer that got stoned By: Eric Champagne  
Chapter One: Higher than a mother fcker

It was another gloomy day within the Gryffindor common room, Ron, Harry and... "Who the fuck..." ...Ron, the dumb ass in the corner and Hermione were... "What the hell, you little mother fucker, call me a dumb ass will ya." Harry said disgruntled. "Do I look disgruntled to you, you fucking cock sucker, and quit saying that shit after I talk, you don't fucking know how I think you little bitch, show yourself, I'll kick your ass." Said Harry looking now even more constipated. "Bring it on hoe, fuck with me will ya..."  
"Harry, Harry... who are you talking to." Said Hemroide. "You shut your bitch ass up you dirty slut, it's just between him and me." "Who in the hell are you? And quit calling me constipated, do I look like I need to take a shit to you?" Well yah ya do, I am the narrator and you're fucking up my story. "Your story, your fucking story! This is my life and you're fucking it up, with your fake ass shit flying around no wonder you ain't got no bitch, I'm gonna shit in your eye." "Your stoned again Pothead aren't ya." Said Ron annoyingly. "You, you fucking skinny ass bitch, I'll kick your ass around like the little red-headed step child you are." With that Ron shut his mouth and ran squealing like a little bitch...I mean girl into the dorms.  
"Now if you're the fucking narrator, go get me that dumb ass house elf...um...Dooby."  
You mean Dobby.  
"Whatever that little shits name is, go bring him here?" With that Dobby the house elf appeared.  
"So Dooby didn't I fucking tell you to refill my stash?"  
"Sorry Sir, there is a plot, an evil plot..."  
"You little bastard who the fuck are you talking about?"  
"Dobby can't say sir."  
"You will tell me before I decapitate your ass and stuff your head onto the wall."  
"Dobby is used to death threats sir urgh..."  
"...You tell me right fucking now," said Harry while almost choking the life out of the little house elf.  
"Urgh, ucrk, lord...urck...vic...urgh...Lord Vikeadin...uhh." With that Harry let the elf go.  
"Now that's all I needed to know, now what does this dealer charge?" Said Harry anxiously.  
"You better get your dumb ass up you stupid elf, and now get me my gravity bong?"  
"Sir here sir." Then Harry slapped the elf across the room.  
"You fucking bastard." Said Hemroide.  
"Shut the hell up, you still going on with that spew bullshit, spew on this skank." Then Harry grabbed his dick.  
"And you, you fucking narrator, leave me the fuck alone!" While stoned and drunk Harry passed out. Ha take that Pothead your ass is asleep, fuckin pansy...sorry had to get that out. Now where is his stash?

The next day Harry awoke with a hangover the size of Uranus.  
"God damn it, it wasn't a dream." Harry then went to stand up.  
"Oh fuck, my ass, it fucking feels numb, oh shit and it hurts like a mother fucker, what the fuck happened."  
Well I felt a little horny last night, I tried to stick it in the couch and screw the hell out of the cushion but that was kind of rough and hurt a little, so then I found a hole in the wall but soon found out it was home to five mice, and I'm not going to explain that, so I looked around again, and there you were. Past out on your stomach so I grabbed you're hips and I...  
"Oh shit, mother fucking god damn it." Harry yelled as his ass began to throb even more.  
Harry grabbed his wand and said healido and his ass was healed. Mean while Hemorrhoid was sleeping with her head faced down in Harry's lap. Waking up she looked at harry.  
"What the hell did we do last night?" She asked. "Hell if I know." Harry grinned, slowly Ron made his way out of the dorm. He was carrying a big glass bong with a shopping bag full of weed. "Where the fuck is my stash," harry bellowed. "Ron get your ass down here, what the hell's in that bag." Ron jumped and dropped his bong, with a loud clash it shattered and the water sprayed everywhere. Then he ran for the dorm room again. "You little bastered," harry yelled, damn that shit stinks." "Hey hemorrhoid were is Mike?" "Mike who, who are you talking about?" "You know Mike Okisbig don't you?" said harry with a wide ass faggot grin across his face. "Didn't I tell you to shut the fuck up and go find a bitch like I told you!" Well I did last night, I already told you that story already.  
"Oh fuck, blhm." Harry then puked all over the floor in front of him.  
"Now where the fuck is my go damn stash?" Harry yelled while feigning  
for some drugs.  
"Hemorrhoid get your loopy ass up there and get me that bag Ron dropped!"


End file.
